Dreams

I am having
and remembering my dreams a lot lately

usually a sign of stress for me
or major change

A few nights ago I dreamed that I started a new job and at orientation I discovered that each new employee received a new kitten.  If you didn't want the kitten, you were required to sign the Kitten Declination Waiver

I was staring at the waiver reading it while the HR person held up a mewing kitten (and everyone else is petting their kitten in a room filled with adorable mewing) saying "I don't want a kitten - and the HR person keeps pressing me to take the kitten.  I signed the waiver eventually (meow, meow, meow)

yesterday I was waiting all afternoon for the delivery of an AC unit that never came

I fell asleep on the sofa and dreamed of my ex husband -- someone I haven't dreamed of in years

We had a horrible fight which he tried to end by making love to me -- and I freaked out in the dream and shouted at him (I'm not a big shouter so this was strange) and threw him out of my house

I am stressed beyond belief at work
and

as I get closer to the November court date - I think more and more that the date will be extended -- or that things may not go in my favor

I alternately have the fantasy of getting the Pixie
and
losing the pixie

both are beyond emotional

and yesterday I finally wrote to the Man and told him about Tex.

and he was sad
as am I

we keep mourning the loss of each other over and over again
and we need to stop

just stop

Yes I will always love him

I will also

always love

Mr. C
M
Sir P

I have never stopped loving a man in my life

I even love the Ex

but it is time to move ahead
and free myself for new possibilities

whether Tex is the one or not

it's time

lol

it's time to sign the Kitten Declination Waiver and move on